Unexpected Friendships

Friendships can develop in the most unexpected places and circumstances, proving that human connections can transcend differences. I was reminded of that on Thanksgiving when I read an article about the ‘Thanksgiving Grandma’ and the young man she met in 2016 when she mistakenly texted him, thinking she was messaging her grandson about Thanksgiving. Despite the text misfire, ‘Grandma’ still welcomed the young man to join her family’s Thanksgiving table. Nine years later, the tradition continues, and a deeper connection has formed.  

True connection can form anywhere, we just need to be open to it. My mom, Wilma, modeled that with her friendship with Lucretia that began in 1964 when they met as Catholic school teachers in Kentucky. They were raised in the different worlds of suburban Massachusetts and rural Kentucky yet bonded as they became new parents, the start of a multi-generational family friendship that has lasted 60 years.

By the mid-1980s, Wilma was a busy fifty-year-old with four teen and tween kids still at home, and her role as ‘taxi & feeding mom’ meant little time for self-care. A doctor told her she needed to start exercising to lose a few pounds and manage her blood pressure, so she embraced the growing trend of mall-walking. I remember how most mornings school drop-offs were followed by her trips to Turfland Mall to walk multiple laps.

We started hearing stories about her fellow mall-walkers, mostly senior citizens. But one connection extended beyond the confines of the mall when Wilma befriended a young mom named Tina Brooks. Tina was a nurse, raising two small children with her husband Randy, a former University of Kentucky football player. She and Randy were at least two decades younger than my parents. On the surface, these two couples had more differences than similarities.   

There’s no word yet, for old friends who’ve just met.

Jim Henson

Even so, a strong friendship began. My parents acted as a bonus set of grandparents to Tina’s young children, Bolen and Maranda. Once my siblings and I went off to colleges and careers, we’d hear about the many football games, dance performances and graduations my parents attended to cheer on the Brooks’ talented children.  

When my dad passed away in 2016, Bolen and Maranda presented us with a beautiful album of memories and photos of times spent with my parents. My parents remained in Kentucky for another 25 years as we kids settled into adult lives in New England, Chicago and California. The photo album captured how meaningful this relationship was to the Brooks family, and I know my parents loved this family as their own.

The legacy of this connection has continued. When Tina’s nephew Vinson was looking for an affordable place to live a few years ago while studying medicine in Boston, it was a no-brainer that he moved in with my recently empty-nested sister Monica and her husband Adam.

My parents’ friendship with the Brooks family showed us the power of connection, and how sometimes what starts as an exchange of pleasantries could lead to a lasting, and potentially multi-generational, friendship.