Embracing the Darkest Months

January is a tough month in most of the U.S. Not only is it cold and dark when I start and end my commute each day, but the return to work or school after a holiday break is just hard.

Over the years, I’ve relied on a few coping techniques, such as working out more often, or taking a class, to keep me from wishing away this dreary season. This year, with my son home from Syracuse University until mid-month, I wasn’t able to fit in a class, so I had to find a few new strategies to embrace the season.

First, I’ve decided that getting outside, for at least a few hours in nature each weekend, was a priority. I was helped by a text from my friend Shiva inviting me for a nature walk last Sunday, reminding me of the beautiful trails in the Cook County Forest Preserve, a short drive from my home. Spending time outside walking with a friend is a great way to reconnect and stay committed to exercising.

Second, I’ve chosen to embrace more social opportunities than I typically would this time of year. I like to hibernate in winter, mostly venturing out for work and groceries. My husband likes to cook, so we love our cozy evenings at home. But I’m an extrovert, so the energy I get from time with girlfriends is like a strong dose of sunshine.

Last Friday, I accepted a last-minute invitation to meet at my favorite Glenview Mexican restaurant, El Traditional, to celebrate two friends’ recent birthdays. And this weekend I’m back in my hometown of Lexington, Kentucky, to introduce my boys to the experience of a UK basketball game with one of my high school besties, Michele, while visiting with members of the Thomas family, longtime family friends I’ve written of before.  

My third strategy is to embrace a beginner’s mindset, a practice I first learned about when working for Northwestern’s Kellogg School of Management. This approach is said to help business leaders, as well as anyone looking to make the most of each day. In researching the practice, I liked how podcast host and author Maggie Rowe’s guest Taka Tara explained the practice and how it translates from the Japanese word ‘shoshin.’ Sharing in Psychology Today, “that shoshin combines two things: shou, which means “beginning,” and shin, which means both ‘heart’ and ‘mind.’ So, it’s not just about thinking like a beginner but also feeling like one—heart and mind working together.”

This practice allowed me to see a familiar forest preserve through new eyes on my walk with Shiva, and to notice some new and different things about my hometown of Lexington. As we walked from Joe Bologna’s, my favorite Lexington pizza spot after dinner last night to the 21c Hotel, I took in the older buildings lining the street, noticing one that dated back to 1838. As I’ve now lived for three decades in the Chicago area, a city that was essentially rebuilt after the great fire in 1871, I’d forgotten how much history Kentucky holds.

And this morning, I decided to skip the Starbucks near my hotel in favor of a new coffee spot, The Greenery, that opened in 2024. It’s housed in an historical building on Main Street, serving up tasty coffee and good vibes. As January unfolds, I’m learning how to brighten our darkest months by embracing the beauty and connection that surrounds us.

Thank goodness for the first snow, it was a reminder – no matter how old you became and how much you’d seen, things could still be new if you were willing to believe they still mattered.

Candace Bushnell