Hiring Friends

My husband and I embarked on a home improvement project a few years ago that was big enough to require the services of an architect. We began by collecting some recommendations from local friends who had been through projects of their own. One name that made its way to the top of our list was a dear friend from our neighborhood. We knew she was an architect with a great reputation, credentials and personality. Nonetheless, we agonized over whether to hire her because we were worried that working on a project together might ruin our friendship.

I know I’m not alone in questioning whether working with a friend is a good idea. As much as it may seem appealing to hire someone you know, potential downsides might include blurring the lines between a work/social relationship, overlooking a skill or performance deficiency to avoid hurting feelings, and permanently damaging or losing the friendship if things at work go south.

At the same time, it can be tempting to want to collaborate with someone you enjoy being with. The work would probably be more joyful with a friend around, and the level of trust is likely to be higher with someone you already know. When Julia and I began planning to work together on this blog, we really hadn’t collaborated on a long-term project since we served as Student Council officers back in high school. In the 30 years since, our friendship had deepened and we had developed a mutual admiration for one another’s story-telling skills. We agreed that we had the foundation to collaborate on this project, but we were sure to incorporate some ground rules for how we would communicate and work together. Needless to say, we’re still going strong–both as friends and co-bloggers.

Before hiring a friend, you may want to consider asking yourself whether you truly understand what you need to know about your friend’s work ethic and communication style, and if you’d be comfortable giving honest feedback in all scenarios–good or bad. You also owe it to yourself to research whether your friend is the best fit, with the necessary skill set, for the job. No need to set anyone up for failure or disappointment, especially someone you care about.

You gotta have friends – or coworkers – to get through the tough times at work, or anywhere else!

Matthew McConaughey

For our house project, we ended up hiring our architect friend for the job and we were delighted with the results. Not only was it a joy to work with her, seeing her skills and talent in action gave us a new appreciation for her abilities. Moreover, she understood our lifestyle better than someone who didn’t know us could have. She also really cared that we ended up liking her work. All in all, we were thrilled with our house in the end, and the process of building was far less painful working with our friend. She was a tireless advocate and perfectionist, making sure that our house finished up better than we could have imagined without her guidance. From her perspective, our friend appreciated working on a nearby project for people she knew. She was also able to take extensive photos to post on her website to showcase a job well done. A win-win for all involved.